Unraveling.NU

hate typepad

I fucking hate typepad already.....I promise you that after I'm moved that my site will be back to my html and design. 
i can't really customize typepad, and i'm on a 30 day free trial, so my trial isn't working out.

My net will be on Tuesday.  send us safe wishes as we start our drive to houston tomorrow evening.
xo Jen

My dad has all the answers!

so sorry in my last entry I sounded like a whiney dork.  Truth is, the oral surgeon met me at his office on Sunday and he packed my teeth with clove and zinc oxide, and since then I've had 100% relief of my mouth pain.  pain relief makes a huge difference when you look at your life. 

Everything in my house is packed..... and I'm ready to go.  I'll spend the  next few days cleaning, and then we're out.

rip pope john paul II, wow, now my dad finally gets to meet the pope.  My dad actually liked the pope desipte his dislikes for growing up catholic.    It's funny, my dad always had "all the answers"  he really did...haha.  now he really does have "all the answers" is he talking to the pope and they are discussing bs catholicism?  is my dad telling the pope, "wow it really is all true!"  I'll never know.  I just know that my father surely does have all the answers.(just wish he could still share them all with me)

I hate it how sometimes I sit and dwell on my father's death..... I hate it how I don't really have faith in "GOD" per se.  I know there is someone bigger than me, i just don't know who or what.  I do know that my dad wants me close to my sister. I do know that my dad wants Hunter and Brandon to grow up together.  I do know that my dad did not want my sister to move to texas after her college graduation and brandon 's birth.................  but now that he's gone, i know that he wants me to move close to her, even if it is in Texas.

Thank you for the kind comments on my last entry.  You are right Aidan, yep i'll be on my life long dream of dayshift, and i'll still be in the love of my life, the ER, Level I trauma center......couches can be bought , happiness cannot.

hate it

dude, i hate my life.  here i am awake at 5am because i fucking hurt............. my teeth fucking hurt............  i have no more medicine and i refuse to to the ER ............... ( because i work at the fucking er, i swear i won't go there unless i'm holding my amputated arm,)

AND, i'm just heart sick because I have brand new ( only used for less than a year) furniture back in a storage area in Ohio................ but yet i'm looking online for used furniture, or i'll just rent it once i get to houston...................... i hate this situation.
I only spent 3G on the furniture, and it's gonna cost me another 2 G to move it from there to Houston..........so i say fuck it............. and get new/ rent or get used in the meantime.........

why do i have to move like i do?  why did my dad have to die?  why did my mom have to take my boyfriend?  Why does life suck?

Hunter is "Kid of the Month"

I drove to Vanderbilt  tonight and edited the time clock.

  I have to get paid vacation for the two days that I called off.    I get so sad sometimes , when I leave things/jobs/people behind.  I've only been in Nashville for 6 months...... just enough time to make friends, but not REALLY get to know them.  .........and here I am moving again.  I'm not sad about seeing new places, meeting new people and doing new things......... I just hate what I leave behind.   My aunt , grandparents, and all of my new furniture, and the best ER job ever  are still in Ohio.  My mother, brother, and vanderbilt are gonna be in Nashville.......... and I'm heading off to Texas.   

Here are photos of my messy house, and packing with spacebags! ( click for bigger pic)

On another note, Hunter made "Kid of the Month" of April, 2005  at SingleMom.COM . He is such a fuckin' rock star!!!

Haze

My past few days have been in and out........ Today when I woke up my face was twice it's normal size, The surgeon told me it was gonna be this way, but for some reason I didn't believe it could happen to me.    I had to call off work today.  I could not go looking like this, and I cannot properly function and take care of patients while I'm on q4 demerol 50 mgs.

Moving to Houston is getting closer and closer, I packed up our kitchen things and Hunter's toys yesterday.  I want to leave right now.  I'm not on the schedule at Vandy next week, so I guess I really could leave any time now.  I have a follow up at the oral surgeon's office on Wednesday, so i'll wait til after I follow up.

Got my sidekick in the mail today.  I can't get it unlocked, and i'm hating it.  anyone wanna buy it?  So instead I got a NEC 525 off of ebay which should be here in a few days.  LG says it could take 20 days or longer to fix my LG phone.  fuckers.  I refuse to drive to Houston without a cellphone in my pocket.

new sidekick

I'm supposed to wait 3 days before I smoke........... I am not waiting 3days, I just stepped outside and smoked. 
My teeth hurt, no worse than before I had them pulled, but the demerol definitely takes the edge off.
The last thing I remember is the Doctor starting my IV ( which didn't hurt) and then i was in a wheelchair going out to my babysitter's car. 

I broke down and bought a  sidekick .  I bought it yesterday and i'm waiting to get it in the mail. I like the versatility of it, and i'll still be using my sony clie with palm 5 for work though.  Having the sidekick will make it easier to im away from home.

I also picked up a 54k netgear wireless card for my laptop.  I don't really know where the hotspots are, but i'm sure i'll find some on the road.  I already know that flying j truckstops have wireless network.

hunter is driving me insane.  Maybe i'm too relaxed on drugs, but wow, he has tore the entire house up..... i'll clean it someday before i move i guess.

wisodm teeth out!

It's over!  I finally got those 4 wisdom teeth pulled.  I just got home.  my face is numb as hell, hopefully from lidocaine and not from the surgeon hitting a nerve.    I was actually more scared than I should have been.  I'm glad it's over,  I'm not in any pain right now. 

I can be your "Baby Girl"

As I was driving home from work tonight, I was trying to think of the words to describe what exactly my patients in the ER teach me.   Ultimately there are NO words to describe all that I learn on a daily basis.   Not only is nursing a learning career, and I'm always thinking, and learning the newest medical stuff, but each and every day some of of the inner city ER patients teach me about reverence and humility to name a few.  Compassion I guess just comes naturally with being a mother and a nurse.

One of my patients tonight ( not ultimately all that sick) called me  "Baby Girl" over and over again.  she was the nicest patient, not that sick and not that kept up.  Her chief complaint that I could figure out was "attention"  my patient simply wanted some attention, and someone to take care of her.   This situation happens often in  the ER with most of our indigent patients, but this time was sort of different.  As I walked my patient out to the discharge station, she broke into song............. singing loudly about Easter, and saying   "I made that song up" .  Everyone we walked past smiled!  Yes, it was 2am, and yes alot of the people there were really sick.  but none of us could help but smile.
Happy Easter!

Why

I got a new license plate today.  Hunter picked Dragon Ball Z gameboy game.  Got my brows waxed..... nothing major.  Went to my neighbor's and watched an East Coast Ryders  video.  It was volume 2.  Loved it. 

Ya know I think that Snoop is actually gonna miss me.  I mean we just fuck, but he has been wanting to hang out more and more.  I burned him a CD today.  It has that new Nieva song on it, also that song "GirlFight", and a bunch of other stuff that he can listen to

Let me explain why I decided to switch from writing my own html, and graphics to typepad........I just happened to be surfing the net and came across a few sites done in typepad, and they all looked extremely elegant, and simple.  I figured that this is exactly what I need.  You can never go wrong with elegant and simple.  I added some of my own links and stuff to the sidebar, made a layout header, and voila I had my blog up in no time at all.......no need to worry about server changes, extensive downtime, ftp, etc.  I can still change my layout at typepad, but it will be much more simpler to do..   

Someone has my license plate

I walked out of walmart, and my license plate was gone.  I don't know why someone would steal my license plate.....  maybe they needed one.  The fucker cost me 60 bucks when I transferred over from Ohio in February.  I called and made a police report, and drove home, plateless..... I guess I'll go and buy another one tomorrow. 

I hooked up my desktop to the cable modem, and it is MUCH better than my laptop.  Just like old times I'm flying again.  I switched from Norton to  Mcaffe AV today on both computers.  It's a free download for Vanderbilt faculty and staff with my username and password. 

Hunter got an Easter card and money in the mail from my aunt today.  He wants a new gameboy game.  We'll go do that tomorrow AFTER I get a license plate.